Jessa Duggar disclosed her miscarriage in a devastating 18-minute video.
Jessa posted a heartbreaking video to her YouTube channel on Friday detailing the tragedy, which begins with her and her husband, Ben Seewald, gathered around their four children to inform them that Jessa is expecting baby No. 5. The video then switches to the former TLC performer saying that she was having some problems.
When Jessa and Ben went to the doctor for a checkup, an ultrasound technician told them, “the sac looks excellent. The baby does not.” Jessa said she instantly began crying, and the technician gave them a minute “to absorb the loss, sitting there and holding hands and grieving.”
“When you lose someone so close to you, it does make heaven that much sweeter,” she says in the video titled “Heartbreak Over the Holidays.”
Throughout the ordeal, Jessa did not hide her emotions. The 30-year-old recalls second-guessing the physicians’ dismal verdict just before the operation of the dilatation and curettage.
“I just wanted to ask, ‘Can I please have one more ultrasound? Please? Someone check, make sure,” she recalled as they wheeled her back. “I was getting all these anxieties that they had done something wrong.”
She also shared the most heartbreaking moment of her loss.
“Just waking up after the operation and having this hollow feeling inside because you know the life in you is no longer there; you never got to meet your baby or say those goodbyes or anything.”
Jessa also stated that her husband and mother were there to console her immediately after the treatment.
Jessa and Ben married on November 1, 2014. A year later, on Nov. 5, 2015, the couple welcomed their son Spurgeon Elliott, and another child, Henry Wilberforce, on Feb. 6, 2017. They received their first daughter, Ivy Jane, on May 26, 2019, and their second daughter, Fern Elliana, on July 13, 2021.