Reddit’s well-known AITA (Am I The A**hole) forum is a place where individuals may ask strangers on the internet to provide their impartial thoughts on who they believe was right or wrong in tough circumstances in their life. Unsurprisingly, family feuds and difficult circumstances that develop around life’s significant milestones, such as weddings and birthdays, often feature.

However, one member came to the site in April 2019 with a very difficult circumstance. It was not just about the birth of his kid, but also about his father’s death. The original poster (OP) said in his post that he

“had to make the hardest decision of (his) life.” He went on:

“My wife went into labor a few weeks earlier then (sic) expected and she ended up giving birth at the hospital. The day it happened she told me that she was in the hospital and needed me however I had just left the house an half hour prior to go see my father who was likely about to die (he did a few hours after i arrived). I decided to see my father one last time and i felt like it was more important than seeing my child’s birth because i will raise him and see him everyday for the next 18+ years and i really need to say some things to my father before he dies.”

Talk about being between a rock and a hard place! OP went on to say that, despite his very difficult situation and apparently rational approach to dealing with it, his decision was not well received by everyone he knew.

For Illustration Purposes Only (With Models) — istockphoto.com/Fly View Productions

OP continued:

“My wife and the rest of her family are … p***ed at me and said that birth is one of the most important parts of our lives and i needed to be there to support my wife and see the child.”

He explained that obviously, he didn’t want to be caught in such a lose-lose position in the first place, but that he “felt seeing (his) father for the last time was important, especially since (he) hadn’t seen him in weeks and (they) weren’t on good terms then.” Thankfully, however, they managed to resolve their differences in that final meeting before his father passed. OP welcomed the unbiased opinions of strangers to better understand whether his choice was the right or wrong one.

The internet was quick to respond with their opinions on the subject. Overall, folks believed that no one was notably incorrect due of the nature of the OP’s quandary, but that he made the proper option anyway. The most popular remark, which received over 15,000 votes, stated:

“You needed to be there with your wife. You needed to be there with your dad. Literally a life and death situation. You could only be in one place. I understand why you chose to be at your father’s death bed. But you owe your wife big time, because birth isn’t about the baby as much as it is supporting your partner in the process.”

Another person replied to that comment: “Owing his wife big time means he did something wrong, He made the right choice, difficult as it was.”

For Illustration Purposes Only (With Models) — istockphoto.com/filo

Another user commented:

“This was very likely the hardest decision you will ever have to make. I don’t think there is even an answer for what the right thing to do was. Your wife was scared and needed you during labour, your father was dying and you wanted to see him one last time. You did what you could with an absolutely (terrible) scenario. You would have had regret no matter what choice you made.”

Although many people felt for the man and his “impossible situation,” others were sensitive to how his wife must have felt too. One person said:

“… your comment that you get to see your kid everyday for the next 18 years makes me understand why your wife is upset. Being there for the birth is not about the baby, but being there for your wife. You let her down. You may have had good reason for doing so, but by justifying it as ‘I get to see the kid everyday’ you are minimizing how your choice impacted her.”

Following how viral his post went, OP added to his original message and updated netizens as well as thanking them for weighing in on his situation as he appreciated their “support” amid the “hard time.” He added:

“My wife and i are on good terms but I’m still (having problems with) some of her family. She understands my predicament and doesn’t hold it against me.”

Thankfully, OP and his wife were able to sort things out, and despite it being an incredibly difficult situation, the majority of users felt that OP’s choice was understandable.

For Illustration Purposes Only (With Models) — istockphoto.com/Charday Penn

If it were you in OP’s place, what would you do? What’s the worst dilemma you’ve ever had to face? Let us know, then pass this on to those you know so they can weigh in too.